Humorous and funny Spoken Word poems and/or funny poems about Spoken Word. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Spoken Word funny poems!
Written by
Hgarvey Daniel Esquire
Categories:
humor, spoken word,
Broken Spell Check
A musician splits a chord of would
Super Hero where's a bright read hood
The baker gently needs his doe
A gardener has her cede to sew
Something old, something gnu
something borrowed, something blew
Written by
Phillip Arnold
Categories:
animal, bird, flying, humanity, humorous, i am, spoken word,
Birdperson
Birdpeople, they fly. birdpeople they glide. you wont see them. they live in the trees, watching you breath and breed. Those nasty human beings. doesn't this world belong to everything?
dictated by Jason Scogin.
Written by
L Milton Hankins
Categories:
feelings, humorous, irony, spoken word,
Backhanded Apology
Sorry if I upset you,
I really didn’t mean it
Actually, I meant it
Until I saw it upset you,
Now I’m sorry you are
Upset by my words
But I got them said,
Which I intended to do.
Written September 12, 2022
POEM OF THE DAY
Poetry Soup
September 14, 2022
Written by
Line Gauthier
Categories:
child, fantasy, fun, humor, joy, spoken word, youth,
Joy Joy Joy
what ever is going on
in that joyful
little brain of yours
only six years old
and you’re brimming
with imagination
a vivacious fantasy world
in those big bright eyes
and words spewing out
like an overzealous fountain
a bottomless sense
of giddy humor
a full-blown half-pint comedian
AP: Honorable Mention 2020
Submitted on November 11, 2018 for STANDARD CONTEST NO.135 sponsored by BRIAN STRAND
Originally posted on November 7, 2018
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
character, fantasy, giggle, spoken word, word play,
Visions Absurd of Grandiosity
Overcome by a wave of curiosity
I decided to try out seriosity
For which I'd no particular precocity
'Twas an ill-fated breeze of impetuosity
With visions absurd of grandiosity
I'd portray Julius Caesar with proper pomposity
Though, to be sure, my toga's fit was an atrocity
Not to mention my Latin dialogue's tortuosity
Yet utterly convinced of my latent geniosity
I spoke my lines with preternatural verbosity
Hark! Were those boos of unaccustomed ferocity?
~ To the nearest Exit, tomato-smeared, at hypervelocity...
Written by
Jimmi Canada
Categories:
graduation, growing up, heart, history, humor, marriage, mentor, mirror, muse, myth, spiritual, spoken word, thank you,
Walk
A bulging extremity,
a feminist integrity,
a swaggering centipede,
the cops arresting me,
my dick the right size,
the bang coming out of your eye's,
the sensitivity upon demise,
the dew and dripping from the sky's,
the eagerness of eloping,
the magnitude of doping,
the honesty of groping,
scattering scorpions glowing and scoping.
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
america, confusion, funny, history, language, spoken word, woman,
The Boston Tea Party - 1773
An ancestor known as, "Miss Lottie"
Was a New York socialite "hottie"
To her lasting disgrace
She slapped Paul Revere's face
When he invited her to the p-ah-ty
Written by
Volodymyr Knyr
Categories:
animal, bird, kids, humorous, language, spoken word,
Geese
All Porto geese
speak Portuguese.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Written by
Dan Kearley
Categories:
confusion, funny, nonsense, spoken word,
Concerned
Their are certain words being said,
that many people neglect to hear.
They are often repeated many times everyday,
to me this seems kind of weird.
One of the words that concerns me,
is in fact that very word.
A word I've been hearing for so many days,
this peculiar word concerned.
On television, radio, and in conversations
everywhere I go it is said.
This peculiar word so often repeated,
it's always popping into my head?
Now that I've passed it on to you,
when you hear it, you might become concerned?
Or you could just laugh and think of me,
the listener to the worlds concern.
Danny Kearley 7-22-14
Written by
John Beam
Categories:
cheer up, fun, humorous, inspiration, nonsense, slam, spoken word,
Scat Skene
Raised above the cello ding ding ding Reaching out to say hello song song song Stepping in the ring gong gong gong Well that’s just all wrong ping ping ping Pauper’s know not his king pong pong pong The cloth was not cut swing swing swing
Written by
Volodymyr Knyr
Categories:
body, humorous, language, spoken word, words,
Your Lips
Close-clenched lips
stop tongues' slips.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Written by
John Beam
Categories:
adventure, funny, home, humorous, seasons, spoken word, winter,
A Good Winter's Cleaning
What are Cabinites all things you find when cleaning cabinet dwellers
Written by
Volodymyr Knyr
Categories:
food, fruit, humorous, people, spoken word, violence, words,
A Peach and a Speech
The bigger/the richer/the faster the peach,
the better the chance to catch up someone's speech.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Written by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson
Categories:
funny, humor, perspective, satire, silly, spoken word, words,
Can I Say Bleep On Tv
Can I say BLEEP on your show?
"No, that's not allowed."
Why not? It's not a bad word.
I'd think I could say it numerous times,
Like, BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP.
"Stop that, it'll just be bleeped."
Well then, can I say smegma
Or at least shorten it to smeg?
"I don't know what that is."
It's is a lot worse than BLEEP
I'll tell you that.
"Isn't it just a made-up swear word
Used by Lister on Red Dwarf?"
As point of fact it's not
I wonder how they got away with it
For so long
When I can't even say BLEEP.
"Then what is smegma precisely?"
Roughly the male equivalent
Of female sootikins.
Can I say sootikins on tv?
"Sounds harmless enough."
Great.
Written by
Abdulhafeez Oyewole
Categories:
allegory, anti bullying, change, deep, humorous, rights, spoken word,
Sans Servile
In sang-froid, sass cords:
Sangoma dashes siren,
Thunder crashes trunk;
Sarky banters with lippy.
Spim for Santa maidenhead.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
for him, humorous, hurt, spoken word,
The Truth Hurts
He’s adept at not mincing his words
Venom flows like enormous great turds
On his throne he will sit
Vitriol he will spit
Packs a punch in the heart of us birds
Some may know a man just like this
Words like fists - he slams us a kiss
He is cruel; he is curt
Using speech that could hurt
His sharp words you cannot dismiss
Can’t control what flows out from his mush
To the point - he won’t beat round the bush
There’s no compromise
No little white lies
Tells you straight that you’ve got a huge tush!
N/A in contest judged on 6/27/16
Submitted to I go Zero,Nothing, Nada 1 sponsored by Broken Wings
06~24~16
Written by
Phatt Matt
Categories:
adventure, deep, funny, hope, imagination, spoken word, write,
The Realm
Human nature is the cause
we can never ascend
but I want to go to the realm
a place much more
scary than I would like to pretend
a place where angels
and demons are in conflict
to me it would be
a weird tourist attraction
I won’t be taking photos
I would want to be
part of the action
of course the battle
would only be for the divine
that is why
I fight them in my mind
what if one day
it would materialize
a feat to be realized
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
conflict, humorous, spoken word,
Shut the Duck Up
Old Pattie just cannot stop talking
Voice grates like a mallard duck squawking
Can't you just be quiet ?
For once you should try it
Her hen pecked husband left walking!
Written after we went out tonight - this woman would not shut up and in the end her hubby just walked out of the room
6/10/18
Written by
Reynaldo Mast
Categories:
care, clothes, fear, funny, health, humor, spoken word,
My Own Foot Quote
Washing your feet do not smell
You will be alive to tell
With soap smell of rose
Keeps your feet compose
Wear shoes that fit well
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, spoken word,
She Will Not Shut Up
Sue suffers from constant lorgorrhea
This condition has no panacea –
Like a parrot who’s squawking
She just cannot stop talking
It’s well-known as verbal diarrhoea
7/13/18
Written by
Line Gauthier
Categories:
animal, funny, spoken word, travel,
Bear Convention
I dreamt
I was a big success
a public speaker
much sought after
I was in such high demand
forever invited
to travel the world
One day I was
up north in Nunavut
that’s not too far
from the North Pole
I stepped up to the podium
I looked out at everyone
I froze
unable to
get a word out
I got the giggles
and couldn’t stop
The old tip of imagining
your audience in the buff
always worked for me
so here I had in front of me
sitting ever so quietly
one hundred bare bears
wide eyed
just looking at me
waiting to be
let in
on what
was
so funny
AP: Honorable Mention 2020
Posted on November 17, 2019
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
baby, humorous, parents, sad, society, spoken word, technology,
Baby Talk
As parents we just love to hear
our baby say their first word
But in this technological age
I’ve just read something absurd
I love to hear babies babbling
But will this news story vex ‘ya’
The baby didn’t say mama or dada
Its very first word was ALEXA!
Are the parents just seeking notoriety ...
Or is this a poor reflection on today’s society
Poem inspired by this news story
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5803039/Mothers-shock-baby-sons-word-Alexa-Amazons-personal-assistant.html
6/5/18
Written by
Deb M
Categories:
anger, humor, spoken word, stress,
Vacumns and Garden Hoses
Vacumns and Garden hoses
What can I say ….?
Well, they are the bane of my life
With their temperamental ways
Both are stubborn with a mind of their own
Needing to control the situation
They both catch, kink and “just”stop
Heightening annoyance and frustration
No matter how hard i try
Without success or luck
To not let irritation get the better of me
Preventing me yelling out F**k !!
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
humor, political, satire, spoken word, voice,
Speaking of Bullhorns
A politician using a bullhorn
places it over the mouth
Though given the stuff that comes out
it ought to be positioned down south
Written by
Christopher Goss
Categories:
fun, humorous, repetition, spoken word,
Writer Not a Fighter
While the drunks on the street
Are cryin' fight, fight, fight
I'm in the house
Singin' write, write, write!
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer, not a fighter!
And while the drunks on the street
Are cryin' gore, gore, gore
I'm in the house
Writin' more, more, more!
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer, not a fighter!
And while the drunks on the street
Are throwin' up, up, up
I'm in the house
Goin' hyuck, hyuck, hyuck!
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer not a fighter
I'm a writer, not a fighter!