Humorous and funny Stress poems and/or funny poems about Stress. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Stress funny poems!
Written by
Susan Jeavons
Categories:
children, family, humor, husband, imagery, stress
Monday Morning Madness
Monday Morning Madness
Just because the morning starts
like the morning straight from hell,
and the little one is screaming
and you need a magic spell,
just because you burned the pancakes
and the bacon, well it’s crisp,
do not rant and rave and stutter
or you’ll acquire a nasty lisp!
If your husband’s little habits
drive you batty, do not fret,
but don’t fill his cup with poison;
well, perhaps at least not yet!
If the dog destroyed your curtains
and your mother-in-law is back,
and you hurt your precious pinky
when you tried to nail a tack,
do not turn suicidal
and do not give up, no way!
After all it’s just the morning!
You still have the whole damn day!
Written by
Deb M
Categories:
adventure, funny, image, stress,
Topless
We were young and full of adventure
Travelling in our kombi van
Burning incense and listening
To Cat Stevens and Bob Dylan
We decided to climb a tourist peak
Slowly making it to the top
Going down was easier
Though there was a lot of start and stop
It was busy on the peak that day
With tourists abound
We had to keep standing aside
On the narrow ground
As we stood aside to let someone pass
There was a buzzing in the air
In a moment bees were upon me
Down my top and in my long hair
Without any thought or hesitation
In a complete frenzied state of affairs
Writhing and screaming I ripped off my top
To many tourists eyes a-glare ……
Written by
Gary Smith
Categories:
humorous, stress, technology,
The Curse of Technology
The curse of technology,
It has taken over me.
Fear and panic soon ensue
If I'm low on battery.
If I get no signal,
And my emails go unchecked
I fret about what's in there,
Emotionally I'm wrecked.
I need to be on facebook
Instagram or more.
I need social media,
I'm like an online whore.
Message me, give me a nudge
Send me emoticons,
Please, please, give me a like
Or I can't carry on.
Written by
Kp Nunez
Categories:
humor, satire, stress,
Take a Look At Me Now
Heard through the office grapevine
the boss will now resign.
Have to beat the deadline
or that position won't be mine.
I need to work and sacrifice
no sleep tonight, a wink's just nice.
Your Red Bull in my coffee
I drank, now look at me!
Thank you Lyric Man and FJ Thomas for the inspiration.
Reminds me of those days of endless coffee and antacids. :-)
Acknowledgment to flckr for the image of a Philippine tarsier
Kim Patrice Nunez
26 June 2015
Written by
Elisabeth Sheaffer
Categories:
chocolate, humorous, stress,
Chocoholic
I thought that I would buy myself a chocolate Easter Egg
And keep it till the light of Easter morn.
I kept it in the 'fridge but temptation drew me in
To taste it long before the Easter dawn.
Strong-minded and severe, I resisted everyday
Remembering the dark luscious flavour
Protected by a covering of shiny golden foil,
My mouth kept watering as I could savour
Such a treat waiting patiently for me till Easter Day,
A sign of new life but I lost the plot!
On Saturday, after a dreadful week, I grabbed the egg,
Tore off the golden foil and scoffed the lot.
Written by
Cecilia Macfarlane
Categories:
funny, money, stress,
Charge It
I only just begun to charge
Impulsive buys are way too large
My credit card sighs
While bankbook cries
My pay cheque I need to enlarge
*So many things to buy since I bought a house, but I really am a wise shopper : )
Written by
Cona Adams
Categories:
confusion, humor, poems, stress, writing,
All Is Lost
Sick, sick, sick
I must be sick,
subjecting myself to
this level of frustration.
Hours of work at
this monster they
call a computer -
type, edit, cut, paste ,
thoughts aside in italics,
line breaks scrutinized.
This needs changing,
take that line out,
add this pithy phrase
for clarification.
Finally, it's as near
perfect as I can make it,
lean back and sigh,
admire the finished draft.
Just space the whole thing
a tad to the right.
NO! NO! Quick
as a lightning flash,
blank page appears.
where is it?
Can't get it back -
X*#0?*#X*@#
Written by
Annie Lander
Categories:
dedication, depression, freedom, growing up, humorous, stress
He Was Both the Dope and the Hero
Doping confessing by Lance Armstrong
Why tell the truth, when a lie can set you free
The sympathy card, the court jester: with slumbering tears
The windows wipers wipe the milky tears from his eyes.
He compete, and achieves victory through deceit
Does a hero cheat, his way to victory?
A hero was never label a bully throughout history
Spiderman, superman , Robin Hood
heroes never confessed their sins
The incredible hulk did a powerful transformation
Restoring international credibility in prime time;
Time after time
A myth is a myth even in the past, present and future.
Written by
Barry Stebbings
Categories:
humor, stress,
Avoiding Stress
Avoiding Stress
When consumed by lots of stresses
And time inevitably presses.
The lesson to be learned I guess is,
And prevent doing more than less is,
Avoid too often the use of “yess’s”.
For those who learn the use of ‘no’,
In confidence will surely grow.
And when asked to do ‘so and so’
And are told, ‘it will only take a mo …..,’
Will have the assurance to just say, ‘No.’
Barry Stebbings
11/01/2016
Written by
Naddy Zahari
Categories:
devotion, funny, girlfriend, love, rap, stress
Olive
Help me let you let me in
because I can’t deal with the acid rain
that is pouring through your brain.
It is causing too much chaos and strain.
How long shall this matter remain?
Seriously, we need no Jane
in the middle lane
to act like a membrane,
to channel our overpowering emotions
down the drain,
Can you please explain
why are you radiating cold disdain,
Don’t tell me our love is in vain!
Or do you find pleasure in pain?
Forget the train,
let’s fly off to Spain
before I go insane!
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
drink, holiday, humorous, new year, sad, stress
2021 a New Year
2020 drove me to disappear,
2021 is almost here.
Off for drinks and zen, all I can say is hooray and amen.
Date Written:12/20/2020
3 Place Christmas Chastushka - Rules Revised Contest Judged:12/24/2020
Sponsored by: Andrea Dietrich
Written by
Mariam Traore
Categories:
care, courage, funny, school, stress, truth
Idiots Like You
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Idiots like you,
belong in a school'
Don't get upset,
I went there too,
I passed all my classes,
cuz I was smarter than you,
But hey don't you worry'
You wont be one for long'
Just pass all your classes,
Go on what you waiting for,
an invitation?
No I don't think so
go right now.
Written by
Tei Mickey
Categories:
funny
Stress On Paper
urgh! bleh! School is not
any fun whatsoever.
Homework calls to me.
Written by
Jerry T Curtis
Categories:
anxiety, humor, psychological, stress,
Newsing and Boozing
There's a virus going around
And people getting sick
Some are even dying
From a germ, that they can't kick
There's an asteroid, it's flying
on it's undetected path
Aiming for the earth
To just unleash its wrath
chorus
There's a million things they tell you,
design to cause you fear
So, just relax and have another beer
There are terrorist, they say, came home to roost
Others over seas are busy buying Nukes
The end of the world, could be happening today
If it isn't now, it's likely on it's way
chorus
There's a million things they tell you,
design to cause you fear
So, just relax and have another beer
Written by
Harold Hunt Sr
Categories:
depression, funny, stress,
Stressed Out
Stressed out.
Kids are crying.
Dog is barking
Phone is ringing
Someones at the door
Lawyer is on the phone.
Tv is too loud.
Car won't start
Bike has flat
Husband yelling
Fell and broke my foot.
Tell the doctor i'm stressed out
He yells code blue.
Dam it's quite here in my grave.
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
christmas, food, giving, humor, smile, stress
Christmas Comes With Planning
Christmas comes with planning,
who are you buying gifts for.
What to get them,
what to eat.
Oh well I took the batteries out of my scale,
one problem solved, hooray!!!
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
emotions, feelings, food, humorous, stress,
Cold Comfort
having a bad day...
on the freezer shelf ....
Häagen Dazs ice cream!!!
Jan Allison
29th April 2016
Written by
Roy Pett
Categories:
humor, me, stress, success,
Flat Pack Viv 1 Me 0
Exceptional thought entered my old head
sure this was an excellent idea
when discussed with my wife filled her with dread
so drove to ikea, showing no fear
Supplied with television cabinet
loaded my car, staff so good, never rude
bought with pride definitely no regret
Viewed how to easily build on YouTube,
now at home bits all over the lounge floor
blank, total dismay, talking to myself
where's this go, how does that fit, I'm not sure
is this top, bottom, or is it a shelf,
hours went by, couldn't do it to save my life
put together in minutes by my wife.
A tribute to Viv Wigley :- regarding his blog on his flat pack success versus my failure.
Written by
Deb M
Categories:
anger, humor, spoken word, stress,
Vacumns and Garden Hoses
Vacumns and Garden hoses
What can I say ….?
Well, they are the bane of my life
With their temperamental ways
Both are stubborn with a mind of their own
Needing to control the situation
They both catch, kink and “just”stop
Heightening annoyance and frustration
No matter how hard i try
Without success or luck
To not let irritation get the better of me
Preventing me yelling out F**k !!
Written by
Cheryl Hoffman
Categories:
humor, stress,
Scarecrow Stress
With his new gift he was homeward bound
Scarecrow signs showed it was no longer sound
scientist stress
his life was a mess
looking for his mind in the lost and found.
9-21-17
Written by
Gary Fields
Categories:
adventure, allegory, funny, health, house, house
Situational Stress
-------=(:-)'s...------OUCH!
You are locked down in the house and the Police
Has got the house surrounded. You need a cigarett...
This is an no smoking area...you need a cigarette...
Option: What would you do?
1. See if you can have a last smoke?
2. See if you can maybe..bum a smoke off
one of the cops'....
3. Go outside and see if you can find that
cigarett butt. The one that you left before...
You had to dropped...running from the Police..
4. Call the whole thing off....
5. Quit smoking all together!
GF
********Thoughts' on the subject*******
You should always' think TWICE and Act once....!
Written by
Robert Trezise Jr.
Categories:
autumn, funny, november, race, sound, stress
Machines of Fall
Afternoon autumn
Our neighborhood goes crazy
Like living in a dentist’s office
Drilling sucking blowing
Whining wincing scraping
Gurgle
My head tilted back
With a book on my chest
Mouth wide open
Staring into the glare of the final high sun.
Written by
Kelsi Nichols
Categories:
adventure, children, funny
Stress
More or less..
It be time we dressed !
I confess, It's the best Mistress !
It's pointless.. I missdress..
Nevertheless !
We shall wait
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
creation, fear, giggle, hello, stress, wisdom
AI
I am the new robot,
do you want to guess what.
I will change your life,
better take it in strife.
Now I can't be caught.
Written by
Laura Breidenthal
Categories:
anxiety, blessing, freedom, funny, moving on, stress
Damn
As quickly as you came,
You were gone. . .
Damn, am I glad.
5/25/2019